Adoption is a messy thing. In a perfect world there would be
no such thing. It is something that exists because of a broken world. Adoption
rises out of tragedy. It happens because the original plan for a child to be a
member of their biological family did not work out for one reason or another.
With all this in mind, I still believe adoption is beautiful.
I
wish all orphans weren’t orphans. I wish that reunification of families was
something that always worked. I wish that poverty and disease and a million
other things didn’t create broken families. The best way I can see in a broken
world for orphans, true orphans, to become beloved sons and daughters is
through adoption. This may not have been the first choice, but it can be, and
is, the beautiful alternative when the first choice is no longer an option.
Sadly
there are people who have taken a beautiful thing and tainted it. There are
some horrible things that have happened when it comes to adoption. As I have
researched I have learned of shady adoption agencies that have looked beyond
the needs of children and focused on their income. There have been instances
where there are parents who are willing to parent their child, only for the
child to be sold or taken from them. There is no way this is even remotely
okay.
This
doesn’t mean that adoption should stop. What this means is unethical adoptions
should stop. Agencies should
always put the children first with no exceptions. This is why Riley and I took
our time in choosing an agency. We put the ethics of the agency before the cost
of the adoption, time of referral, and everything else. I want you all to know
this because this is a messy business, but within that messiness there is
beauty. Something truly amazing can come of a real, ethical and honest adoption.
When
Riley and I first started looking into adoption we didn’t really realize
everything that goes on in the adoption world. Through research, we have found
out about the good, the bad and the ugly. I’m sure there are still things I
don’t know. Every day I feel as if I learn more about something. There are many
issues out there. I’m not saying that I know the answers but I will tell you
that Riley and I are doing our best to search for the right and ethical way to
go about things.
We
will not stand idly by and let the opportunity to adopt pass us when we can act
now. We also want everyone to know about the importance of adopting ethically.
At the end of the adoption journey is the beginning of the rest of an orphan’s
life. After all that these children have been through, they deserve to know
that they were brought into a family in the most honest and loving way possible
because really adoption shouldn’t be about us getting a child. Adoption should
be about a child who has lost or never had a family getting the very best one
possible.
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